I went to dinner with WWW on Monday night. She is very captivating. I am drawn in with desire and it isn’t physical, it is more than that. I feel an honest tenderness towards her. We both feel this is a situation where we could both delve deeper into each other with connectedness. I really do like her.
I also feel this isn’t good for me. The boundary push is too great. There are also some health issues that I haven’t written about that were of concern for me.
After dinner, I broke things off with her. I should have waited until we were out of the restaurant and walking in the neighborhood. She is such a beautiful soul, it was difficult to forcefully push a wedge between us when there is so much beauty I see inside of her.
The health issue was my tipping point. I haven’t written about it earlier, but I have had more than enough of having a health issue involved with a relationship. While she doesn’t have a life-threatening problem, it would still weigh on my mind of how we would need to limit some physical interactions and being aware of restrictions on certain lifestyle choices.
We quickly and deeply affected each other. I think my tender and serious need for deep connection hit her like a brick wall, shattering some of her reality as much as she shattered mine with her sexual mischievousness and her claims of celibacy.
I honestly hope we can continue a friendship with one another. I just can’t give her my heart, or share her bed.
The house is starting to come together. There is lots of concrete being poured outside for walkways and patios, effectively diverting water away from the house. We have put drains and ABS pipes under the concrete to move the rain run-off. We have over-engineered everything. Huge over-kill on prevention. But the long-term hands-off permanence of these solutions give me peace of mind.
The basement dry-wall is going up, and both kitchens will be installed soon. I need to get off my rear end and purchase the appliances… washer/dryer, two dishwashers, and a refrigerator.
Soft Cell- Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret
Say Hello, Wave Goodbye to this Tainted Love